31st July 2006

Done

I have completed my tattoo. It hurt. I am now eternally marked.

This is it, and I will post a proper pic when I can.

Damn.

Thanks Jie.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Mon 20:39 BST
 

This is what I do on my days off

Who says I'm not committed?

Kenny says: Hey, I'm on vacation and you're not! I am just constructing an email back to the Muppet.
GSP says: hohum!! its fun!
Kenny says: Hey -- have you read the blog today? Just discovered another stash of explosives here.
GSP says: i will look now
GSP says: cool we can blow the squirrel up
Kenny says: Excellent idea. I will mention it to my dad.
Kenny says: We could rig the pressure sensitive gubbins in the trap to the dets.
GSP says: yep good idea
GSP says: or a trip wire
Kenny says: Well, I already have the pressure sensitive stuff working. I'll just need a A->D converter and BANG, no more squirrel.
GSP says: you could shape the charge underneath some peanuts so you could blow its head off


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Mon 11:48 BST
 

An excellent day to be off

I am so pleased I took today and tomorrow off work. The cricket was brutally self-indulgent. And I spent yesterday in the boozer playing chess with Yozzer Been Larding. The healing process takes longer as you get older.

I am about to do something I swore I would never do. I'm going to get a tattoo. I wanted it to say Nski in Chinese but apparently even though you can phonetically translate the word, it would be meaningless, so I have come up with an alternative. It's the third one of the options my gorgeous friend Jie came up with for me. When she realized that her translation was for a tattoo, she went into panic mode. Highly amusing.

Being an absolute coward when it comes to any kind of pain, I may have to indulge in a couple of sherberts beforehand, although it transpires that tattoo parlors appear to have developed morals in England nowadays; if you look like you've had a sniffter they are unlikely to accomodate you on the basis that your blood may be too thin. I figure if I'm upright my blood is thick enough. And I might have enough Dutch courage to cope. I'm thinking I might have to employ the same tactics next time I have to go see a dentist.

With a sweeping change of subject, I've just nipped out for an inter-post cigarette and found yet another detonator in the wash-house. As is well documented, my grandfather was a miner. He had an obsession with explosives, and between my grandmother's house and my parents' house, we probably have enough explosives to blow up a small island. Every few weeks, we find more secreted ammunition and he's been dead for over twenty years. GSP would be proud.

It only struck me, just as I wrote that, that smoking cigarettes while handling an explosive is not the brightest thing you can do.

Oh God. The pain of the last couple of days is setting in. I may well head down to Th'Oddies for a medicinal couple before hopping on the good foot and doing the bad thing. Don't you just love vacation?


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Mon 10:37 BST
 

30th July 2006

I have to type quickly

The reason being that the paternal unit managed to remember my laptop, but not the power supply. Muppet! ;)

I've spent the morning watching the news come out of Lebanon. And I think it's fair to say I'm angry. I'm angry that the world looks to the US as being the cause. As I have said many times in the last few days, not everything that ever goes wrong is the fault of the US. I'm angry because Israel are a bunch of neo-Nazis. And, I'm angry because Hesbollah have a combined IQ of 70 (less than a lettuce). There, off my chest -- I was going to really, really rant but I can't.

The cricket was either great or a let-down. I do not know which. We won with two days and one innings left, but that means I was denied two days of sitting in the sun drinking beer, dozing and generally being slobbish. I may sue someone about that.

Damn, I need to go. Laptop battery lives are phenomenally short.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 13:19 BST
 

29th July 2006

Wow

One of my favorite people ever is back in touch. She scared the hell out of me when I first met her, but she's top quality. I'm too easily intimidated by good looks. Urs (commenter below) was a potential customer of mine God knows how many years ago. When the tech scene went bang, I really wanted to hire her; the HR department couldn't stomach someone as open as Urs. Idiots.

I've told this story a couple of times via email in the last week or so, and Urs brought it to mind again. I have been having trouble with someone whose management style is just "bully". I can't subscribe to that. I took the chap in question to one side and said "Listen mate, big fat Yorkshire blokes don't intimidate me. Pretty girls do; and you are not a pretty girl."

He has avoided me since. Thirty-love to Kenny.

When Urs came up to Minneapolis for an interview, we had her round for dinner. It was amazing how well Nski and Urs got on; similar backgrounds and outlooks. I was a bit phased by it all.

After Urs had left, I made a comment to Nski about how Urs was so out of my league, which she took to mean that I was lusting or some such. Fact is, I was talking about her lack of fear. I think I am right in saying that she had just given up sky-diving on the basis that she wasn't getting the adrenalin rush she used to.

I'm sure there was a reason I started down that path, but I'll be buggered if I can remember it. Too damned early.

I've still got the important stuff to write but I have a weekend of cricket about to start. I'd promise to write it but there's literally two of you who will notice. ;) Nay matter. I'll get around to it soon.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sat 07:48 BST
 

28th July 2006

Revelations

It has just struck me that there are more pictures of my mum's old dog than there are of me in this house. And even more of my brother and the flip-flop.

And then I thought about my grandparents' houses. Neither has a picture of me anywhere, but they have every single one of my cousins.

That is the reason I am justifiably paranoid; it's official.

I have something of tremendous import to say later, but I can't do it now. I need to craft my words wisely and I'm not sure I can do it properly. We'll see.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Fri 07:04 BST
 

27th July 2006

Squirrel saga continues

Today's catch?

Sweet FA. Well the last time I looked, it was sweet FA. I did spot the bastard creature in question though. It stared at me as I smoked and I didn't have time to get the gun before it meandered off. I cannot tell the paternal unit that I had that chance. It would send him into apoplexy.

I got an email from an old friend in the US yesterday. Funny how the more things change, some things remain constant. Kind of comforting.

I have to boogie for a train to continue stressing myself. Happy frickin' Thursday. Two days before test match cricket and lots of beer. Oh yes.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 06:58 BST
 

26th July 2006

Not feeling the love

I've been tasked with mission impossible at work and it's stressing me beyond all measure. It's got to the point where I am literally losing sleep with worry. Call me paranoid, but that and another event make me wonder whether I've been lined up to take a fall.

I'm also highly concerned about the fate of some of the guys I have been working closely with for quite a while. It's awful when a team of "can do" people are disbanded. That happened with the last mob and looks likely to happen here.

To add to the stress, I'm leaving the house at 7 and arriving home around 8, completely buggered from work, travel and reading documentation en-route. Doesn't make for an interesting blog really, but if I get chance, I'll tell you some more alligator/squirrel/hedgehog stories.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Wed 12:14 BST
 

25th July 2006

The trouble with squirrels

/obscure and very sad Star Trek reference

I mentioned a while ago that my father has been having trouble with squirrels in his attic. He has paid large amounts of cash for humane traps without any joy. I nearly bagged the blighter with the air gun only to hold off and discover that, in fact, the target in my sites was the next door neighbor's brush as he happily washed his greenhouse (why?).

Last week, the paternal unit decided that the squirrel's run was down by the side garden so set out a trap there. The idea is that you bait the trap and once Cyril gets in there, a pressure sensitive pad closes the door and you call a chap, who presumably comes and takes the critter away to be set free in someone else's yard, and he then offers his services to them in catching it. Kind of like a squirrel pimp.

Anyway, trap set, I looked on and laughed. I joked that he'd probably end up with a gator in there (ref Steve). This morning I went out there for my first smoke and what should be in there, but a seven foot gator hedgehog? I have no idea how I am going to break the news to him when he gets up...

"Morning Pater -- the good news is the trap does work."

"Congratulations on trapping a man's mammal."

Suggestions?


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Tue 06:17 BST
 

23rd July 2006

Sam et al

Well, I went off to York to see my old mate Jezza, and a great weekend it was. We'd kind of boozed our way around York on Friday, so we went out for a civilized walk around the walls on Saturday. As we neared the city center, Jezza wanted a cash machine but I heard the refrains of a piano. And then a lass singing. I knew it was Sam instantly. You cannot mistake her.

We went to trace her and there she was, larger than life and twice as talented. Poor Jezz sat there for half an hour waiting for her to finish. I sat loving every second of it. I even got a "this is for Kenny" (name changed for obvious reasons).

She came off stage and wandered over to say hello and gave me a kiss. After that, she said something about me looking huddled. Now I could have explained that I haven't had any physical contact with a gorgeous woman for nearly two years, but I didn't. And meeting her at random, and getting a kiss from her was, how you say, utterly wow. It was just a "hello" kiss, but when you've been up against the wall for so long, it's still kind of "damn!".

Hell, Sam might actually read this, so I'd better go easy.

There's loads more to say about the weekend but I am tired. The usual weekend sleep beckons.

It was great to see Jezza again though. He taught me so much and finally, I may be able to repay him for that.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 19:02 BST
 

20th July 2006

Choices, choices

My friend, Jie, from work has translated something for me.



I am awaiting her recommendation.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 11:01 BST
 

Cleansed

My travel arrangements still apply but a really nice evening out with the crew down here has lifted my spirits. 'Twas one of the guys leaving party last night. The usual suspects attended; Chinese, Polish, Northern Irish, Psycho, etc. Thankfully neither of the usual suspects started on the shots.

Two things were weighing heavily on my mind yesterday and beating the ever-loving shit out of me. One is work related, and I'm still stressed to hell about it. The other is private and I should know better than to worry about it. It will be what it will be and there is nothing I can do to change anything. At work, I'm pragmatic. Sadly I can't replicate that in the real world.

Another day, another dollar, or deeper in debt -- delete as applicable.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 08:40 BST
 

19th July 2006

Expect nothing more today

I am in a seriously bad mood. I'm pissed off with so many things today that the slightest thing will send me over into the abyss. Work, life, leisure; you name it, I hate it with a passion.

I'm travelling tomorrow so I wouldn't bank on anything then, and then off to see the Jezmeister over the weekend. You might get something from chez-Jez but I suspect I will be radio silent for a while as I try to get myself out of this funk; I learned from my last (admittedly much more severe) bout of serious depression that blogging is not a good thing to do when you're in that mindset.

Later peeps.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Wed 15:27 BST
 

18th July 2006

Today is what?

Ah yes. Tuesday. That must mean I'm off train darn Sarf'.

Yesterday was a nightmare from start to finish. The trains conspired against me, and my own partial stupidity contributed more than once as I went into that travel mode that I thought I had forgotten; the one where I adopt a "Jesus, it's not worth stressing about; you'll get there when you get there" attitude. I'll not bore you with the details but let's just say every single train was late.

I also lost my return ticket at some point during the day so ended up buying yet another ticket to get home. And then the damned platform screen listed my train, and a different one rolled in: on I got, ending up in a station that is another four miles away from where I should have been. Mare.

To add to all this, I developed a violent nose bleed while sat at my desk, just typing. Who does that? Who even has nose bleeds?

So, as you can see, yesterday was a barrel of laughs from start to finish. Let's hope today yields a reversal of fortune.

In other news, I half-watched a show on ferral children last night. I'm not buying it. I can bound around on all fours woofing for England, waiting for some do-gooder to pronounce me to have been raised by wolves.

The train to St Albans awaits, the God of Railtrack pending. Time to brush up on my quiz skills; we now have a reputation to keep up.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Tue 06:44 BST
 

17th July 2006

Gah. It's Monday

One of the perils of being sensible and having an early Sunday evening is that, inevitably, one will be awake way earlier than one is required to be. Ergo, this.

I've been awake for the last hour, had my fill of tea and about a metric ocean full of orange juice. And here I sit wondering when the newsagent opens. Some phenomenally bad planning meant I had precisely one cigarette when I awoke. That disappeared within seconds and I have been left with that all too familiar craving ever since. I guess newsagents must open at six. I will head down there now to find out.

They do. Thank God for that. Unfortunately, the maternal unit doesn't cope with mornings at all and my disappearance for ten minutes to source some cigs and a paper have thrown her for a loop. God, you just can't win. Home too late? Frown. Up too early? Frown. I shouldn't grumble. At least they care.

I got some utterly fantastic news from Nskoid yesterday but I'm not about to write it down on the basis that I made jinx something. If what she says is true, and I have no reason to doubt it, it is the best news I have had in three years.

Anyway, I should away and prepare for work. The weekly shave doesn't happen all by itself you know.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Mon 06:10 BST
 

16th July 2006

Call the medics

I don't know what is wrong with me today. I've got the rose-tinted ones on. Maybe it's the heat, the residual cocktails from last night, the sound of cricket commentary or just it being Sunday, but I'm feeling kind of content. This is a rare occurence indeed.

One of the reasons that I want Nski and the kids to come over here rather than me go back to the US is precisely because of days like today. It's crystal clear, David Lloyd is uttering trivialities and the whole world seems to be okay (well, apart from the Middle East who appear intent on nuking themselves).

One of Nat's first trips over here, we went up to the Lake District. She was beautiful; like a kid in a toy shop. We went past Wordsworth's house and she was literally jumping up and down with glee. I drove a right-hand drive manual car -- she thought that was amazing. She got within three feet of a sheep and freaked out; she has never trusted them since. That trip to the Lakes was N's first taste of cricket. She sat on the bed in the hotel firing questions at me about the rules. Truth is, if you're over ten and you don't know the rules, you never will.

I suppose the reason for the rush of ease is that I now have a vision for us for the first time in three years. I can see Nski getting on well here. I can see all the places that my parents took me to as a kid, and with Z and N being American, the enthusiasm that I had when I saw them will be doubled by the adventure.

Now I just need to make it happen.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 15:45 BST
 

Memories

I'm having one of those days. Nostalgia. It might be too much festive spirit from last night, but today is conjouring up all sorts of memories, both good and bad.

My dear old maternal grandmother is here. She is the epitome of nice. She would never harm a soul, and is shocked by what she sees in the world. My dad and I have just had a conversation about teaching styles; basically comparing notes as to the levels of violence involved. This started after he'd pointed me in the direction of an article on solving Sudoku puzzles. I commented that it was basically set theory. He agreed and then started on a rant that when he was at school they didn't cover set theory until after A-level. Which brought him on to his maths teacher...

His mother looked outraged. That someone had dared to hit her eldest son. My dad told a tale of how he had had a blackboard duster lobbed at him by a teacher, and how he had been that incensed, he had thrown it straight back at "the bastard". Sometimes my dad makes me smile. He's five foot six of nothing, but he has short man syndrome down to a tee. You would never mess with him.

I remember probably fifteen years ago, we used to frequent the same pub. There was a chap who used to go in there who was rough as hell. I knew he was harmless. My dad didn't. There was an occasion where my dad and I were in the gents and said chap appeared. He actually quite liked my dad but had a bad sense of humor. My dad took his comments as a threat and emerged from the restroom fuming at me for leaving him in danger. He wasn't ever in danger. That was just Blackie's way.

So today I am thankful for a long line of really nice people who are my family. Sometimes, I feel like I let them down by being me.

There's also some other nasty business going on with my daughter here. Schoolground nastiness, but with parents. I daren't say anything more as the ex-missus might find this sometime. All I can say is that it's one of those things. I feel for L, but she will have to cope with worse. Shielding children is a worthy instinct, but sometimes misguided. Sometimes, it's better to let them throw the blackboard duster back.

Finally, God bless my grandmother. She really is the sweetest woman you will ever meet.

Hell. I just re-read that and had to think "have I been drinking?" The answer is no; just a nice moment and a nice observation. Occasionally I'm not a judgemental git.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 14:32 BST
 

13th July 2006

Relativity

I had to share this. It's absolutely mind-boggling.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 10:25 BST
 

Big brains and the firewall

For the second week on the trot, you are reading the blog of one of the winners of the quiz at the Whitehart Tap in St Albans. For the sake of anonymity, I will refer to my team mates as A, D and G. D is commonly refered to as Big Brain. G is refered to as Big Brain 2, and he knows his musicals, which makes me doubt his sexuality; he claims his wife has provided him with this knowledge by osmosis, but I hate that visual and truly believe he has sat through The Sound of Music. Show me a straight guy who could handle such torture and I will show you a gay guy who fancies girls. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay of course, but liking musicals is listed in the ten commandments as a no-no.

All of the lads down here, including the Girly Southern Puffter have started refering to me as "Firewall". This is down to my ability to defer hostile attacks to /dev/null. I'm here as a defensive measure. I'm not sure whether that (and the nickname) is a good thing or not.

In other, related news, G, D, a guy called R and I managed to complete the big 4 crosswords yesterday: Telegraph, Times, Independent and Guardian. I'd like to say I played a big part in that achievement but I can't.

It has come to my attention that the only thing that I am useful for in quizes and crosswords is my knowledge of places (the US as a specialist subject). Whenever clues or questions crop up that refer to the US, all eyes turn to me, and surprisingly I tend to know the answers. No big deal really. After all, I score higher on the US citizenship test than I do on the UK one. The problem, particularly with crosswords, is that I still spell in American...must remember to change that.

Anyhooooo, I have a crossword some firewalling to do on port 42 so must away. Happy Thursday.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 10:05 BST
 

12th July 2006

Busy body

I mean that I am run ragged not that I have started to become Pauline Fowler.

Once again, I am down South until Friday. In the meantime, I give you:

The demon ducks of doom. Nomenclature doesn't get any better than that. The next quiz night I go to, I'm using that.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Wed 16:23 BST
 

10th July 2006

Pooped, scanned, called and conned

I'm pooped beyond all measure. That was a bit of a weekend, followed by a day at work that seemed to last for at least six life-times. I have a document to complete by the end of the week, and there don't appear to be enough hours between now and then for this to be remotely practical. All I can do is aspire and perspire in an effort to achieve the impossible. What the hell, I perform other miracles. Why not this one?

I got some scans this morning from Nski. Z's birth certificate, our marriage certificate and Nski's passport. All I need is Nico's birth certificate and we should be okay for me to file for them all as residents of the UK. That is NOT to say that this will happen; this is a back-up plan. There are quite a few hurdles to jump yet.

On the subject of hurdles challenges, I had an interesting call today with my old CTO. He and the head developer chap have been working on some interesting stuff for a while, and it sounds like they are finally at the point where they could make a great stride forward. I hope so. They were laid off at the same time as I was from the Minneapolis crew. Although they have had some consultancy work from the same, they have been out of the game for a while so it's good to see them getting a break. It just goes to prove, old vision scientists don't die; they re-emerge and do it all again.

An update on the car front, seeing I am getting well tired of the train. I sorted out the problem with my loan application four weeks ago (i.e. registered myself back on the electoral roll that I never unregistered myself from) and have been trying to contact this company ever since. There are two choices of communication with them; a web form that never is responded to, even though they state a call-back SLA within 1 hour of submission, and a premium rate phone line that costs something unGodly like a year's salary per minute and where you will be on hold for a minimum of your middle aged years. Arseholes. I have every temptation to submit their game to the trading standards people. The only reason I want to use these people is to avoid another hit on my credit score. Although, thinking about it, I may just take the hit.

Right. Early night for me tonight. Guten nacht.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Mon 21:56 BST
 

9th July 2006

Why, oh why?

I should know better than to plan on going out on a Saturday night.

Yesterday, the belt was attained, just a tad shy of £10. Result. All chuffed to bits with myself, I arranged to meet Rob at Mad Jack's. Only it didn't stop there. From there we went to Owd Mary's. Owd Mary was the landlady at the Red Lion in Ashton when my grandfather was in his thirties. He had a bit of a thing for her, and my mother ritually spent her Saturday nights there in the care of Mary. Strange that two generations later, her name is still used. She must have been quite a character for a town so full of personality to still remember her.

Anyway, Owd Mary's was bizarre. It was like going back 20 years in time; the same kind of fickle nonsense. I had to leave. As I said last time I went to Mad Jack's, who is snogging who is not my business. It just leaves you feeling jaded, and I am not fond of that feeling.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 14:30 BST
 

8th July 2006

Wrong

No.

How's about we bomb the ever-loving crap out of them? Sheesh. When will people realise?

Now, about that belt...


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sat 12:52 BST
 

My mission, should I choose to accept it

Aka belts revisited

Right. A decision has been made. I am sick to death of crap belts. As Tracy pointed out, I am starting to resemble a wannabe rapper crossed with a plumber with builder's bum cleavage. A stand must be made. The objective is clear. I will head into Wigan this afternoon and purchase a conventional belt, complete with all the requisite attributes; leather, holes and a proddler gubbins. And it had damn well better be less than £10, or a small South American country will be nuked.

You have been warned.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sat 11:58 BST
 

7th July 2006

Steppin' Out

I went to see Joe Jackson last night at Shepherd's Bush Empire. He was utterly brilliant. His piano playing abilities are phenomenal. In the same way that I want to give up trying to play guitar when I see Nick Harper, Jackson had me wanting to give up piano, just like Tori always does.

'Twas an evening of revelations...office gossip etc. However I did find out that GSP is a fellow-fan of both The Wonderstuff and a worshipper of Kate Silverton.

Top gig. Top company. I honestly feel more at home down here at the moment.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Fri 09:05 BST
 

6th July 2006

Microsoft dictionary

Why is it that the Outlook/Windoze dictionary does not contain the word muppet by default? I will be submitting a bug.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 13:04 BST
 

Puffter's blog

The Girly Southern Puffter (TM) has a blog that he has been coy about. He is protesting that he should be an honorary Northerner. Whatever.

One thing about GSP (as we will now refer to him) is that he really is right of Attilla the Hun. During a frustrating meeting yesterday, he got out a Beretta catalogue, signalling his desires. I swear blind this man will be front page news at some point.

I have advised him that he should move to Texas and buy a Humvee. Actually, scratch Texas. They're too liberal there.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 10:48 BST
 

Reasons not to be cheerful, part 3

I traveled from Bristol to St Albans yesterday. This involves a change at Paddington and at Farringden. The journey from Bristol to Paddington was fine; I was in first class. I kept sending bags of peanuts back to the peasants (co-workers) in economy. I could have slummed it with them, but I was feeling self-indulgent and had a crossword to do. It wasn't Northwest first class. Just a bigger seat and less people. No complimentary champagne and blow-jobs, but still better than the average train journey.

The trip from Farringden to St Albans, though, was appalling. It was like Tokyo but without the space. Some people seem content in being in contact with fellow travellers. My rule is that no-one should touch me, ever. I'll put a caveat on that; if you're top totty, you can bump into me frequently, preferably at around 30Hz (joke!). I'm going to be a tad offensive here, and will probably gross you out a little, but I don't know whether you ever had the displeasure of some fat git with no respect for personal space have their damned arm-wings that are typically icy cold flaps of blubber slapping into you -- it is vomit inducing. I was about to go postal on the feckers, until I realised that I'd missed my station and ended up on a platform in Harpenden waiting for the Brighton train back.

Have I mentioned how much I hate the South?


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Thu 09:25 BST
 

4th July 2006

Happy Independence Day to most

Except for the knob-end who just nearly ran me over while talking on his cell phone and attempting to negotiate a barrier into the carpark next to the station. To him, I hope his turkey is dry and that his future cell-mates are justifiably called Butch and Butcher.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Tue 09:43 BST
 

New technology

Remember the days when belts involved leather, holes and a proddler kind of thing that slipped through the chosen hole? So do I. Last week, my belt of ten years shuffled off its mortal coil. There was a horrible snapping sound and it was all over. Tears were shed, eulogies were read. Gone.

Since then I have had to resort to using a belt that came free with a packet of Weetabix or some such. It is hole free and proddler free. It appears to operate by inertia in the same way seat belts do. The problem being that if you're not moving at 70mph, its belt functionality is below par, ergo your trousers start to descend. I am not happy. I spent yesterday walking to and from the train station constantly tightening this damned misnomer of a belt.

Time for work.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Tue 07:05 BST
 

2nd July 2006

A bad day for Polar bears

It is hot here. I'm not talking Phoenix hot, just warmer than Brits are used to, probably just above 30 degrees centigrade. So what do the great British public do? Yes. Moan. I am sick to death of people whining about the weather. Normally, they pay good money to experience two weeks of weather such as this, but when they get it for free, the perverse attitude of the Brits to weather kicks in.

Not content with public machinations, the Government (with a capital G) have to jump on the band-wagon and issue a health warning about the dangers of increased temperatures. For God's sake, do we really need advice on drinking fluids when it's hot? I think not.

In other news, I cannot believe that it is already Sunday. My weekend has flown by, and before I know it, I'll be on a train to Leeds. Once again, my week is fairly packed. Wednesday morning sees me heading down to Bristol, that same evening over to St Albans, and the rest of the week will be spent there. I have oodles of holidays left, but I fear I cannot take any before the middle of October thanks to deadlines that will not sway. I may squeeze a couple of days in for the test at Old Trafford but that will be my lot. I may see what the week after next looks like from a work perspective and try to eek out a couple of days that I can tag on to a weekend.

By the time I can sit back for a while, it will be too cold to enjoy the outdoors (it is permissible to whinge about the weather being cold) so it looks like I might have to take a short break somewhere outside of England's green and pleasant land. Chicago would be my first choice for obvious and non-weather related reasons.

I've had some lovely emails from Nskoid over the last week or so. The kind that make you melt. The kind that put the World Cup loss to the back of your mind. It just goes to prove that a kind word every now and again, whether you do it intentionally or not, can really affect the recipient. Picture a cheese smiling. Now reverse it. That was me as I read my email this week.

Now I plan on going submerging myself in 8 inches of cold water for about 30 minutes. And when I get out of the bath, I am going to rejoice that I am sweating before I have even towelled myself dry. This is a proper summer. Enjoy it while it lasts...it will be thirty years before we get another one.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 11:06 BST
 

Withdrawal

I had to yank that last post...too much hate and not enough logic. I am still gutted.

The moment that broke a nation's heart:



Careless? Yes. Red-cardable? Debatable.

Ronaldo's wink should seal his transfer fate. Cristiano, start looking for a new house; Torres needs digs in Manchester.


Comments (), Permalink, Posted: Sun 09:05 BST
 

1st July 2006

Don't cry for me

Last night's stag party was a giggle, from what I remember. There were people from many countries in attendance, and that always makes for a more interesting evening. We drank way too much Guinness (thank you to the Northern Irish contigent) and the vodka shots came thick and fast (thank you to the Polish contingent, not). I have no idea what time I came back to the hotel but it must have been a decent hour as I ordered a bottle of white wine, which is currently sat at the side of my bed, completely untouched.

The night was made so much better by Germany's win over Argentina. My (single) long time reader will know how much I hate the Argentinians, a nation that makes a habit of cheating. Watching Germany win on penalties has left me sans voice. I screamed in delight as I watched that final penalty go through, barely able to contain my joy. At that moment I was sat with a Polish girl, her brother, a Northern Irish lass, a Scottish chap and a boat-load of English people. In unison we screamed in delight. So it's not just me that hates the Argies.

It speaks volumes about Argentina that their behaviour after the game was so bad. Yes, we know it's serious but even after we have been systematically beaten by cheats, we don't resort to violence. Punching officials or opponents just shows what a light-weight, pathetic and trivial nation you are. Don't cry for me (Sorry).

Maybe it's a fear of losing to the bastards again, but the final strike lifted a weight off my shoulders. Being the sporting chap that I am, I would sooner we beat them on the pitch rather than not meet them. But this is the World Cup. You take the breaks where you can. Argentina looked too good...we no longer have to worry about them. Brazil, despite their reputation, look like like they have their weaknesses in defence. That said, we still have the Portugal game to survive later. Let's hope it's Germany in the final, against us.

I tell you, my nerves are shot with the tension.

Okay, enough with the good news. The bad is that Nski has been in severe pain. I don't think she'll mind if I tell you that she is suffering from a bone infection in her jaw. She's had a general anaesthetic during the process of treating it but it sounds like there's more treatment to come. All I can do is hope that it passes quickly. When you're so tuned in to someone, you kind of suffer by proxy.

I'm sure that my work colleagues here are bored stiff with tales of my American wife that they haven't met. At least my old crew had met her so could understand the infatuation and the hell that I went through when I thought it was all over. These guys have no idea how much that woman means to me. Too much...

Right. Shower, train, England game.


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